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So my wife and I are sitting in a restaurant after a long day of riding and I turn to adjust and suddenly bbbbrrapppp! I let out the loudest fart either of us has ever heard. My wife is sitting there across the table her eyes and mouth wide open in shock.
Thinking quickly I lean over the table toward her and whisper loudly, "Don't just sit there, say excuse me!"

You guys ever do something stupid and blame it on your wife?
 

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Nope, I kind of like it when she lets me play with her watchamacallits and not doing anything to loose that privileged. I seem to do enough to piss her off by accident, not going to do it on purpose.:)
 

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So my wife and I are sitting in a restaurant after a long day of riding and I turn to adjust and suddenly bbbbrrapppp! I let out the loudest fart either of us has ever heard. My wife is sitting there across the table her eyes and mouth wide open in shock.
Thinking quickly I lean over the table toward her and whisper loudly, "Don't just sit there, say excuse me!"

You guys ever do something stupid and blame it on your wife?
Oh man that's awesome!! Keep them on their toes!!!
 

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I blame the dog.
 
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My grandson started doing it when he was 5 or 6. He'd fart real loud and say, "GRAMMY!". Puss did not see the humor in it... especially since she knew I taught him that.

I wait until it gets real quiet in a public place, stand up, look at Puss, and say, "A HUNDRED BUCKS? OH HELL NO!" and start walking away. Leave her sitting there... bystanders thinking she's a hooker.
 

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My grandson started doing it when he was 5 or 6. He'd fart real loud and say, "GRAMMY!". Puss did not see the humor in it... especially since she knew I taught him that.

I wait until it gets real quiet in a public place, stand up, look at Puss, and say, "A HUNDRED BUCKS? OH HELL NO!" and start walking away. Leave her sitting there... bystanders thinking she's a hooker.
She should shout back out you " I said one thousand, cheapscape "
 

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It's been over 30 years ago but I still remember like yesterday the time me and buddy of mine from work were at Mcdonalds at lunch time and as usual the line was backed up with mothers buying happy meals. All the sudden Larry blurts out " Do farts have lumps, if not I think I just $hit my pants". Well, it didn't make the line any shorter but all the looks sure were hilarious.
 

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So my wife and I are sitting in a restaurant after a long day of riding and I turn to adjust and suddenly bbbbrrapppp! I let out the loudest fart either of us has ever heard. My wife is sitting there across the table her eyes and mouth wide open in shock.
Thinking quickly I lean over the table toward her and whisper loudly, "Don't just sit there, say excuse me!"

You guys ever do something stupid and blame it on your wife?
Usually the dog...
 

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I'd try that on the wife. I think it would be kind of funny. First though I'd just have to talk her into going into her top drawer and giving me back my testicles for awhile to get it done.

PS Women don't fart and women don't belch. They need to bitsch or they'd blow up.
 

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Shhht , mine farts louder than me. The other day, I walked all the way from the kitchen, through our bedroom, to the bathroom just to see if she was alright and hadn't hurt herself, it was that loud.

I just blame the cat, but she ain't buyin' it. Or sometimes, blame it on invisible barking spiders.
 

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So my wife and I are sitting in a restaurant after a long day of riding and I turn to adjust and suddenly bbbbrrapppp! I let out the loudest fart either of us has ever heard. My wife is sitting there across the table her eyes and mouth wide open in shock.
Thinking quickly I lean over the table toward her and whisper loudly, "Don't just sit there, say excuse me!"

You guys ever do something stupid and blame it on your wife?
What was that? A duck? Maybe it was a hardley ableson?

I have decided that you guys fart so often, that you stretch out you a**hole. As you get older it just gets worse, you are the guys we laugh our a** off at when one goes off. I personally wait til I have a stinky one , let it go, and blame anyone else around me. Two can play at that game.
I haven't figure out how to know when you have a "stinky one"... I know sometimes I'll be in a grocery store, I let one out, then move to the next aisle... Sometimes you hear people says the darndest stuff... And kids don't have a filter love when complete strangers get blamed for it...
 
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When somebody rips one out in public I say:
"Did you hear what that asshole said to me"?
or
"Yer breath's the same but yer voice changed".
 

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Shhht , mine farts louder than me. The other day, I walked all the way from the kitchen, through our bedroom, to the bathroom just to see if she was alright and hadn't hurt herself, it was that loud.

I just blame the cat, but she ain't buyin' it. Or sometimes, blame it on invisible barking spiders.
I claim it is a mouse on a motorcycle and I have proof...

Wheel Tire Bicycle Automotive tire Motor vehicle
 

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I'm just say..."Not bad for a hair lip" :angel4:
 
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Wife ripped a loud one last week as we walked across the pool deck (at the club house of our "vacation" home) headed to chairs. There were maybe 6 other people in the area..neither of us flinched. This was the first time we were using the pool...nice way to introduce ourselves.
 

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What was that? A duck? Maybe it was a hardley ableson?

I haven't figure out how to know when you have a "stinky one"... I know sometimes I'll be in a grocery store, I let one out, then move to the next aisle... Sometimes you hear people says the darndest stuff... And kids don't have a filter love when complete strangers get blamed for it...
Usually because I have a small stinky one before, and I know what's coming next. LOL
 

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So my wife and I are sitting in a restaurant after a long day of riding and I turn to adjust and suddenly bbbbrrapppp! I let out the loudest fart either of us has ever heard. My wife is sitting there across the table her eyes and mouth wide open in shock.
Thinking quickly I lean over the table toward her and whisper loudly, "Don't just sit there, say excuse me!"

You guys ever do something stupid and blame it on your wife?
Now that's a guy who truly appreciates "Loud exhaust" :fiddy:
 

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maybe on my daughter or dog, but my wife would kill me.
 
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